Being a big sister....

In 1977 the world was graced by my presence.  At that time I immediately inherited the role of daughter and grand-daughter.  I continued to add a few other roles to my resume; friend, student, chatterbox and  opinionated Conover household troublemaker.

Short of Christian wife and mother there are very few roles I have enjoyed more in life than that of big sister.  If you are an only child, my apologies to you right away.  This entry is in no way intended to make you feel like you missed out on apart of life.  I have been blessed by many only children through the years, my father and best friend being two examples, and recognize the special place the Lord had you occupy to your parent's hearts.

I have very few memories of my only child days even though they were about five in number.  I have no recollections of a desire for a brother or sisters.  I do remember my mom and dad telling me about the upcoming addition to our family and being excited about it.  When the time came, I remember going to the hospital and looking through the little window in the nursery door.  As I peered through two nurses appeared and held two babies up for my wide almond shaped eyes to see.  I can only imagine the width grew as I looked at my shell shocked father and asked, "which one is ours?"

We brought them both home, as surprising as a set of twins was to us, and my sisterly relationship began.  I was immediately smitten.  For the better part of a decade we played, buddied up and talked.  I was proud of them (still am) and was ready to fight to the death anyone who would try to harm them.  Although, I was pretty good at fighting with them, ironically.  At the end of the first decade when I was well into my teen years, I was a bit more distant.  I like to say I was stumbling a bit and trying to find my way, but I know at times I was not always what I should have been to them.

I have always imagined Martha to be the big sister.  I, of course, have no scriptural proof of that but when I look at her interactions with Jesus, I seem to identify more with her for that reason.  She is the one that feels like she must get things done.  She loves the truth and our Lord but she is practical and very keenly aware of the physical needs and comfort of others.  She also strikes me as someone who may have taken her brother's death as a personal fault of her own, but she goes out to meet our Lord because of her deep faith.  In other words, she was deeply flawed but capable of deep love and devotion.  That definition is a big sister in a nutshell, an imperfect woman desperately wanting to be all she can be to those siblings she loves so dearly.

As Christians and spiritual sisters we need to feel that love and devotion for not only our physical siblings but even more with those that we plan to spend an eternity in heaven with.  You are the big sister in Christ to someone.  My hope is that we can all step out a bit from the comfort box and search for that lonely "only child" in Christ, so to speak.  That person that seems to be on the outside fringe of fellowship with other sisters.

To follow are just some ideas to try when you take a step outside the comfort zone.  Some I have tried and some I have not.  We should never perform a scriptural activity like encouraging a fellow sister with the attitude of "what we can get out of it, " but you will be blessed even if it is just the precious sight of her smile.

• Invite the sister for coffee, lunch or dinner, either at your home or out. 
• Ask her to help you with a bible class or project you have, especially if you can match up one of her talents to something in the activity.  Her blessing you will also have a trickle down effect where she has blessed numerous others.  
• Find a craft she enjoys and get together to either do that specific craft or another while she enjoys hers.  
• Send a card to her in the mail.  So many of us neglect this now because of our social media and quick instant text messages, but a pretty card sent snail mail can really change the tone of someone's day.  
• Seek her out at events and make a point to speak to her.  If you are in charge of some area of the event ask for her to assist you.  
• Be her secret sister.  Not in a stalker, or creepy way, but maybe one or two times a year you do an anonymous gift or treat for her.  
• Help her in lighting her burden.  This may seem like a no brainer but sometimes these sisters are neglected and they are not as quickly aided.  If you hear she is having some trial or difficulty make an offer of help.  
• Pray for her.  Even if it is just for her to have a good day, she needs that more than anything.  

White Noise and info overload......

Thank you again for stopping by and I am honored that you take the time to read thoughts.  For the last couple of days I have considered what I want this to be.  Facebook, Twitter and other sites have become like an archery competition.  Everyone throwing thoughts like arrows out into cyberspace for all to see.

 No depth.  

No deep connection.  

Now before you go thinking I am just bashing Facebook.  I am not.  I love Facebook.  I enjoy connections I have made and renewed on there.  But after reading my posts or me reading yours, do we know each any better?

I was driving to my core workout class this morning and I stopped at a light behind a Nissan Versa.  Or at least I think it was a Versa.  It was difficult to tell because the entire back of the person's car was plastered in bumper stickers in a manner that made it look more like a patchwork quilt than a hatchback vehicle.  I looked at this car and asked myself what the owner was trying to say.  They were obviously trying to tell me something.  They must have had some very deep rooted beliefs in some various subjects to pepper their transportation source with such a colorful display.   But, as the light turned green and they turned and I continued on, their desperate attempt to convey messages to me was a failure.  It was too many images, too many messages and not enough space, or time to process them all.  

I wanted to take that lesson to heart as I branched out in a new social media type of form.  Communication has always been a priority for me.  (Ask my family and you will probably get giggles and eye rolls, because in their mind I have not shut my mouth since being born.) As a person that tends to over communicate, my hope in this space is to suppress that and instead replace it with a place for me to meaningfully communicate.  As I come here and reflect I hope to not just be white noise to you.  When we part ways each time from this cyber "chat" we both feel that it was worth our time to be here.    So my presence here may be weekly at times or a couple times a month.  I have no desire to annoy someone who enters with an abundance of opinions or rants.  Nor do I wish to portray a picturesque life here that is not true to our household and home.  

When you do come I hope to welcome you and each of us leaves feeling we can lead our lives in glory to God just a bit better than when we first came.  This may be a lofty idea.  I may fail, many times in that goal, but we can strive.  Most of all, in all we do it needs to bring glory to God.  If I fail in that you would be a friend to me by showing me.  I always want to leave a conversation with love.  Love never fails, but it sometimes can say things that we do not like to hear.  That is okay.  Conversation by its very nature should be engaging and not just soothing, telling us everything we like to hear.  It should make us think, act or change.  However, I will try to observe 1 Corinthians 13:1 when I speak:

"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal."

No noisy gong or clanging cymbal in this space!  No Versa's with an overload of messages and no white noise machines that fade into the background.  Meaningful communication is the order of the day.

A blog.....

The medium is practically a dime a dozen these days.  You are either trying to record memories, journaling, imparting some type of knowledge about a certain subject in which the information may be useful to others, or you are self absorbed and feel that anyone should and would enjoy hearing about you and your adventures.

Or.....
Humans have kept journals and diaries for quite a while and perhaps we do all have valuable life information to share with one another.  Blogs are just the latest in this long held tradition of putting thoughts into words onto paper and in the hands of someone who shall read and glean, if they can, anything from it.  The title is "smidgenandapinch" or more correctly, "smidgen and a pinch".  Because that is what everything is.  A smidgen of this and a pinch of that and it makes the world go round.

Somedays this may be a soapbox.....

Other days it may be an adventure with my children and our homeschool Pickard Academy.......

Still others it may be a cooking blog.......

or a gardening blog (psst.....don't take any advice here as I am still a very new newbie!)

Told ya!  See the weeds!  

But I thank you for coming along with me.  

Who am I?   Let me tell you.  I'm me!  

Daughter of the most High God, saved by His grace through the sacrifice of His Son, Jesus Christ, wife to the most patient and loving man human being there ever was......(him in the middle holding the pie)

Mommy to two blessings I do not deserve, headmistress of the Pickard Academy, Buckeye married to a Buckeye undergrad and Aggie graduate, addicted to boot camp, reader of books, lover of cooking but hater of baking, dreamer of writing, bit of a type A perfectionist personality, and constant worrier!  

Welcome to my thoughts and musings.  You honor me with your presence here!